+1(978)310-4246 credencewriters@gmail.com
  

Description

this is peer’s article. I need you to review the article and write a comment an a letter to him.

All the needed information is in the documents below

Thank you

Argumentative Essay
Is College Worth It?
The college admissions process can be a stressful process that ends in
making a very big decision that could have a long term effect on one’s life. There
are several factors that are taken into account when making this decision. Those
factors differ between individuals, one major one being the true value of
attending college. The value can differ between individuals based on what they
are looking to get out of their college experience. Another major benefit of
earning a college degree is the benefits that come years after the education. Many
people will earn more money at a job compared to others that don’t have a
college degree. (Webber) People who have college degrees are also more likely
to get a job when competing with others who don’t. The value of college is a
personal opinion but overall a college degree has so many benefits that come
with it. Having a college education puts people in a better position in the long
run, in most cases. The value of college doesn’t always have to do with money,
college exposes students to many new experiences and environments.
When determining the value of college, a student and their family must take
several personal things into consideration. The student has to decide what they
want out of their college education and experience. Making the decision of
whether college is worth it for a student and their family ultimately comes from
what they want after college. Some careers may not need a college degree to
excel but in other cases, a college degree can really further one’s career.
(Nuckols) In many cases having a college degree sets one apart from the rest
when qualifying for a job. Obtaining a bachelor’s degree can be a way for
students to stand out from others in a highly competitive job market. College
graduates see 57% more job opportunities than non graduates. (Singletary) The
number of jobs that require a college degree are also steadily increasing. Having
a college degree allows for students to qualify for additional opportunities and
offers them more flexibility in where they choose to work. Having a college
degree allows students to have many more options when choosing a job because
there are simply more jobs available to degree holders than high school
graduates. Pursuing a college education also allows students to make several
connections through networks of colleagues, professors, advisors and mentors. A
network can lead to several opportunities and can connect students with
possible industry leaders. Having a bachelor’s degree makes that student much
more in demand, as the need for skilled college educated workers continues to
rise. Over time more jobs are created and a majority of those are filled by college
degree holders rather than those of just a high school diploma. Also, the
unemployment rate for college graduates is significantly lower than that of high
school graduates. Earning a college degree opens up so many doors for students
who are then looking for a job. The degree allows them to be more likely to find a
job and make more money than those who don’t have a college degree.
College isn’t only about one’s education and professional life. For many
students, going to college is the first time they get away from their hometown
and are able to experience new things in life. At first it can be a nervous and
anxious time for many students but in the long run, it allows them to be exposed
to so many new experiences, a new environment and new people. The college
experience can really develop someone into the person they become, it can be a
detrimental time for many students in learning who they are. College can take
people out of their small hometowns and give them the resources to grow and
transform into something greater. It allows for exposure to people of so many
different walks of life. Students are allowed to try new things and grow as
individuals without their parents’ influence. It is an opportunity to change one’s
mind, heart and self. The people you meet in college whether that be fellow
students, professors or mentors, can have a very big impact on students during
their years in college. Having a certain professor can allow a student to gain a
great appreciation and love for something that they have never been able to
experience before. (Avery) College allows students to find new things they enjoy
and experience them in a new setting. College is also a very important time to
become more independent. For many students it is the first time living without
their parents to do things for them like cook, clean and laundry. Students are also
forced to learn how to be responsible with things like money. College is an
opportunity full of freedom which can become a little overwhelming for some
students but in the long run is all a learning experience and allows for growth.
The four years at college can change one’s life in so many ways and creates
memories that can last a lifetime.
Although a college degree reaps several benefits, the continuously
increasing average college tuition cost makes the question of “Is College Worth
It?” relevant for many students and their families when making the decision of
going to college.The average college tuition costs around $26,000 but can
definitely vary based on location, whether it is public or private and several other
factors. (Douglas) This price has especially increased over the past 10 years.
Many families are not able to pay the price of college tuition up front which leads
to taking out student loans and then often a great amount of debt. The average
amount student loan debt for a four year education is around $33,000 and takes
an average of 30 years to pay back. (ONeal) This number is often very
overwhelming for someone deciding to go to college. They have to make a
personal decision of whether or not taking out student loans and possibly
accumulating a great amount of debt is worth it for them. The pressure and
burden that comes with paying student loans back may make someone’s decision
about going to college for them. However, before making the big decision of
whether or not to attend college one should think heavily about the benefits that
come out of a college degree. One gains several benefits from earning a college
degree both in their professional life but also their social and personal one. The
experience one gains from going to college can last a lifetime and shape them
into the person they become for years after. College can be considered an
investment that in the long run is worth the cost. (Oreopoulos) The value of
college outweighs the possible debt that may come from it. There are several
more benefits than negatives that come from a college education.
The decision of attending college can be a big decision for many students
and their families and there are several factors to take into consideration. For
most, the biggest factors are what the student will get out of a college education
and the cost. Both factors are very important to most students and their families.
Overall, the decision is a very personal one based on what the student is looking
to get out of a college education and degree. The price of college comes with
several benefits that outweigh the possible factors that could turn someone away
from the opportunity to attend college. Having a college degree oftentimes means
finding a higher paying job in one’s field of work and the value of a college degree
would decrease if they were very readily available to everyone. (Jubilee) The
college experience allows students to live in a new environment, meet new
people and experience new things. Overall college allows for students to grow in
major ways whether those be educationally, socially and or personally. In the
long run, the cost of college is worth it after comparing the benefits to the
possible negatives.
ONeal, Anthony, and Ramsey Solutions. “Is College Worth
It?” Daveramsey.com, 2020, www.daveramsey.com/blog/is-college-worth-it.
Singletary, Michelle. “Perspective | Is College Still Worth It? Read This
Study.” The Washington Post, WP Company, 11 Jan. 2020,
www.washingtonpost.com/business/personal-finance/is-college-still-worthit-read-this-study/2020/01/10/b9894514-3330-11ea-91fd82d4e04a3fac_story.html.
Oreopoulos, Philip|Petronijevic. “Making College Worth It: A Review of the
Returns to Higher Education.” Future of Children, Woodrow Wilson School of
Public and International Affairs at Princeton University and The Brookings
Institution. 267 Wallace Hall, Princeton University, Princeton, NJ 08544.
Tel: 609-258-6979; e-Mail: FOC@Princeton.edu; Web Site:
Http://Futureofchildren.org/Futureofchildren/Publications/Journals, 30
Nov. 2012, eric.ed.gov/?id=EJ1015240.
Avery, Christopher, and Sarah Turner. “Student Loans: Do College Students
Borrow Too Much–Or Not Enough?” Journal of Economic Perspectives, 2012,
www.aeaweb.org/articles?id=10.1257%2Fjep.26.1.165.
Webber, Douglas. Proxy Login – University Libraries – USC, 2016, wwwsciencedirectcom.pallas2.tcl.sc.edu/science/article/pii/S0272775715300224.
Jubilee, director. Dropouts and Graduates: Is College Worth It? | Middle
Ground. Youtube.com, 2018,
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ecgcL4Cu75I&t=272s.
Nuckols, William L.|Bullington. “Was It Worth It? Using Student Loans to
Finance a College Degree.” Higher Education Politics & Economics, Higher
Education Politics & Economics. 2309 Education Building, Norfolk, VA 23529.
Tel: 757-683-4118; e-Mail: Hepe@Odu.edu; Web Site:
Http://Ojed.org/Index.php/Hepe/Index, 30 Nov. 2019,
eric.ed.gov/?id=EJ1265734.
Kerr, Emma. “Is College Worth the Cost?” U.S. News & World Report, U.S. News
& World Report, 2019, www.usnews.com/education/best-colleges/payingfor-college/articles/2019-06-17/is-college-worth-thecost#:~:text=For%20most%20students%2C%20experts%20say,only%20a
%20high%20school%20diploma.&text=But%20not%20all%20college%20gr
aduates%20experience%20these%20salary%20benefits.
Peer Review Documents
Your peer review documents will consist of two parts: the first is a descriptive
outline of your peer’s paper. The second is a letter which analyzes how and why
your peer’s paper is working and not working. Through these two documents, you
will examine in detail how your peer’s paper succeeds as well as where, how, and
why it needs work.
Part One: Descriptive Outline
The first step in this process is to read your partner’s paper (in some cases, you
may need to do this multiple times). It’s important at this point for you to have a
solid understanding of the whole paper before you make comments—otherwise,
you will most likely make comments you later want to change.
After you have thoroughly read, you will complete a Descriptive Outline, which
allows you to familiarize yourself with how the rhetorical situation is working (or,
in some cases, not working) in your peer’s paper. The Descriptive Outline focuses
on global moves as well as how paragraphs are working (or, are not working)
together. The Descriptive Outline is important because it will direct your
attention to issues that you will need to address in the peer analysis letter which
follows.
The Descriptive Outline is comprised of two sections. In the first section, you will
address the rhetorical situation and other global issues surrounding your peer’s
paper. In a short paragraph, answer the following:
1. In 1-2 sentences, describe the controversy your partner is addressing:
a. How do they get this information across? Be specific.
b. What is the major claim that your partner is making? How do you
know? Quote the necessary information in your paragraph.
c. How could they communicate this claim more effectively? (Give your
peer 1-2 examples or suggestions).
2. Who is your partner’s audience? If you do not think that your partner
addresses or invokes a specific audience, that’s okay; however, you’ll need to
indicate why you don’t think your partner is doing this and offer suggestions
on how they could.
3. Read your partner’s introduction out loud to yourself. Do you want to keep
reading? (Why or why not? If not, what could they do?)
In the second part of the Descriptive Outline, you will outline the entirety of the
paper using a says/does analysis. Please pay attention to the difference between
saying and doing. What a paragraph says is a one-sentence summary of that
paragraph. What a paragraph does is how that paragraph is functioning for
the purpose of the paper—or how it works with (or against) other paragraphs in
the paper.
As an example, your Descriptive Outline should look like this:
1. Paragraph 1: Unethical Music
a. Paragraph 1 says that using music to resurrect memories from dementia
patients is not an ethical form of treatment.
b. Paragraph 1 says this in order to introduce one position in the
debate and establish that theaudience is most likely people in the
medical industry who have been using this treatment, or people whose
loved ones have been prescribed this treatment.
2. Paragraph 2: (1-2 word description)
a. Paragraph 2 says….
b. Paragraph 2 says this in order to…
As you can see, you don’t necessarily have to use the specific words “says” and
“does.” Rather, your ‘says’ statements function as summaries of the paragraph in
question, whereas your ‘does’ statements are rhetorical analysis. Be sure to use
the specific format indicated in the example.
In some cases, you might find that your peers’ paragraph(s) are working against
one another, are saying the same thing, are doing something very similar to other
paragraphs—or, they might not be doing anything at all. In these cases, explain
why you find the paragraph to be saying or doing these things. You’ll come back
to these instances in your analysis.
Part Two: Analysis
Once you’ve completed your Descriptive Outline, you will be ready to provide
some constructive criticism to your partner. In order to do this, you will write
your partner a personal letter about their paper. This letter should be on topic
and specific enough to be helpful. Simply writing “You did a great job; I didn’t
find much!” might seem like it is a “nice” letter to write, but it doesn’t address the
paper at all, and your peer is left with no help or suggestions for revision. In other
words, it might seem that being “nice” is the kinder way to provide feedback;
however, it’s not kind at all—you are trying to help your peer revise, and giving
them nothing to work with is the opposite of helpful. That being said, please
remember that your letter should be respectful. In short, write a letter that you
would be happy to receive and would be helpful to you.
It is essential that you are as specific as you can possibly be in your suggestions.
Refer back to page numbers, paragraphs, directly quote, or underline/circle in
the paper what you refer to in your suggestions.
For example, saying “Your paper completes the project, but it could be more
effective” does not help at all, and will most likely leave your partner feeling alone
and frustrated.
However, saying “Your paper completes its project by the end, specifically in the
final paragraph when your thesis arises; however, it isn’t effective for the
following reasons. One, you don’t have enough evidence in your supporting
paragraphs on pages 3-4, or at least not evidence that I trust (for example,
Buzzfeed isn’t going to convince anyone in the medical field of your argument,
and that’s part of your audience). Two, the one reliable source (Medicine Today)
is the only source you use that seems to back your claims, so if I were you, I’d find
more sources than just that one. Three, some of your paragraphs (paragraphs 3,
4, and 5) deviate into a discussion about how dementia and Alzheimer’s are
different, which doesn’t have anything to do with musical treatment and how it’s
unethical.”
Your letter should follow the genre conventions of a letter; it should be addressed
to your partner personally, it should be conversational in tone, and it should be
closed cordially and with a signature.
Refer back to the Descriptive Outline to identify the strengths, weaknesses,
possible issues and improvements, or questions you have. You should refer to the
student example if you are not sure if you are being specific enough in your letter.
Peer Letter Student Example
Dear [Partner’s Name Here],
I can certainly see in your essay that you are doing your best to answer the
prompt. For many of the questions posed in the prompt, I can find a direct
answer in your essay.
Q: What does your visual text depict? (specific details, not generalizations)
A: Batman holding Robin’s lifeless body in his arms + descriptions Q: Whom is
the visual text directed to? Who produced this visual text?
A: Voters who decided the direction of the comic.
Q: What is the visual text asking or demanding you to do? WHY/for what
purpose?
A: This visual text demands the reader to feel Batman’s grief and suffering as a
result of their decision. Q: Which rhetorical construct does the image appeal to
most (logos, ethos, pathos)?
A: Pathos is a rhetorical construct that this image appeals to the most
Q: What are the unstated assumptions and/or grounds of the argument? (limits)?
A: An unstated assumption to this argument is that Batman had no chance of
saving Jason Todd.
You get the point. I easily found the answers to many of the questions of the
prompt directly in your essay. My favorite part of the essay was the 5th
paragraph. You clearly gave the limits of the image by saying that the black
background omitted the cause of Robin’s death, and then you clearly explained
why this limit is important, the limit shifts the focus to Robin’s body. The
audience is not distracted by images of the exploding warehouse because that’s
not the point or emphasis of the image.
Also, your MLA formatting is generally good and the paragraphs are broken up
well. Each paragraph generally started with an opening sentence that set a theme
for the rest of the paragraph. For instance, paragraph 4 starts with Pathos is a
rhetorical construct that this image appeals to the most and then you give details
for how the image evokes emotion. You obviously know what you’re doing so I
don’t think I need to talk about this too much more (you put a page number in
the top right hand corner! Etc).
That being said and although you answered the prompt questions, I think that
your essay did not quite fit the prompt’s requirements of being a close reading.
Also, I think that your statements need more supporting evidence and
explanation. Sometimes your arguments appeared to be missing some logic to
connect the dots. To show you what I mean, I’ll give you specific examples from
your paper in chronological order.
In the second paragraph, you provide a lot of background details such as the fact
that multiple robins existed, one became Nightwing, Todd was athletic and so on.
These details are interesting, but they don’t really pertain to the image itself.
Since the prompt of this essay is a close reading of the text I think the focus of the
paper needs to be more on the image itself and not its historical context, and
basically these details do not “do” much for the thesis. I did later understand why
the voting was important as it makes the original readers partially responsible for
Robin’s death so that particular detail can still be useful.
In paragraph 3, you say that black is associated with death which is the primary
symbol of the text, but then in the third sentence you say that the black shading
of Batman’s face is Batman concealing his grief. I thought this was odd as the first
sentence did not really set me up for the third sentence. How is death connected
to the concealment of grief? I’m not really sure if these are two separate points or
if Batman’s concealment of grief and death are considered connected. I think you
can improve the flow if you added another sentence like “the darkness also serves
a second purpose,” or something similar depending on what you want.
There are a few places where you make statements that are not properly
explained, could use more detail, or seem contradictory. I think these improving
these areas will be the most important part of your revision. Here are some
specifics.
In paragraph 4 you write, “Although there were several individuals who wore the
Robin costume, the costume evokes more emotion that Batman’s posture in the
image.” This sentence deals with Pathos since it talks about evoking emotion so it
is in the correct paragraph, but you do not explain why Robin’s costume is
stronger than Batman’s posture. If batman’s posture evoked more emotion, how
would that change anything? I think that for your overall project this sentence
shouldn’t be a comparison between Robin’s costume and Batman’s Posture
instead I think you should focus on just Robin’s costume evoking a lot of emotion
and maybe end the sentence with “even more emotion than Batman’s posture”.
Also, describe the costume and highlight what parts of it evoke emotion. In the
next sentence you say that Robin is always depicted as being lovable, but that
seems to contradict this sentence, “many comic book readers did not like Todd
because he was neither friendly nor acrobatic”.
In the second to last paragraph, you write, “The way Batman is holding Robin in
the image is similar to how Vladek cared for his wife Anja in Maus” and then you
describe Maus. This paragraph actually has more sentences describing Maus than
sentences describing the image and you end with “If Vladek had never checked on
Anja, Anja could have easily went down a corrupt path and never fully
recovered”. The problem is that you never relate the two works at
the end. You have not explained what in Batman’s position is similar to Maus.
Some parts like the last sentence certainly do not apply to the image since Robin
cannot possibly recover due to Batman’s caring. In order to relate Batman’s
position to Maus you could say that Batman is holding Robin very close to
himself (If I did not care about someone deeply, I would not be holding their
dead body close to myself) or you can describe how the way Batman holds Robin
shows caring similar to Vladek’s caring (Batman is cradling Robin not dragging
him or carrying him over Batman’s shoulder).
Looking at the big picture, your project is very clear, everyone should show
compassion by caring for and helping others rather than outwardly showing love
without action. However, the evidence that supports your project and thesis isn’t
doing enough. I think that when you make changes, describing the image in more
detail and following what I explained above, your argument will be a lot stronger.
Finally, I move on to the small insignificant issues with the essay. You must
include in text citations for any outside sources that you use. For example, when
you describe Maus you should have the in-text citation that looks like
“(Spiegelman #)” #= page number. Similarly, the details about the different
Robin’s and the reader’s voting needs to have both an in-text citation and a works
cited entry. Speaking of citing your sources, you say in the conclusion, “While
love evokes a feeling of empathy for others, compassion emphasizes a
sympathetic desire to care for someone”. I’m assuming that this is your own
definition and if so you need to say so or you need to cite where you got this
definition. Elsewhere, the sentence, “this visual text teaches us the true meaning
of compassion” sounds very cliché. Also, I think your conclusion should have a
topic sentence so that I don’t think the whole paragraph will be about seeing
caring in the way Batman holds Robin. The cliché sentence would fit better as an
introductory sentence although I would rewrite it just to be more specific and less
cliché.
Sorry that this peer review is so long. It is not that your paper is particularly bad,
I just wanted to be very specific since my last peer review was not specific
enough. Also, it is a lot easier to point out what needs work than it is to point out
what is going well. I noticed few grammar error and only 3 spelling errors (one of
which is highlighted above) so that is very good. Your thesis is clear; your
paragraphs are well organized so be encouraged by that. All in all, your paper
relies on mostly logos, logical arguments, so you need to make sure that your
arguments are well supported. When you’re revising make sure to focus more on
the image and its actual details rather than outside details that influenced it. I
hope you have had a wonderful spring break. Good luck revising!
Sincerely,
[Your Name Here]
(Imagine a signature here)

Purchase answer to see full
attachment

  
error: Content is protected !!